Holy setbacks batman!

It's like setback central around here!  Temporary ones, I assure you!  I have been having some crazy health issues!  It started a week ago when I had a sinus infection.  I got some antibiotics and all seemed to be going well.  Then on Thursday I had my first nerve block injection in my face.  Monday I had a second, more in depth nerve block in my face.  I also had a dental appointment on that same Monday.  On Tuesday morning I noticed my arms were itchy, I just figured I had dry skin.  Then Wednesday morning I started a new medication to help with the breakthrough pain in my face.  Wednesday night I found myself in urgent care.  Those itchy arms turned into bright red, burning hot arms.  It was miserable!  It turns out I was having an allergic reaction to the antibiotic I had started a week earlier!  They gave me a mega dose of benedryl and a steroid injection.  They also told me to stop the medication for my face pain, just for a few days until my reaction settled down.  Within a few hours, my arms had calmed down a lot.  I figured the worst was over.  Boy was I wrong!

This morning I woke up with a raging headache.  My face was BRIGHT red and hot, so was the upper part of my chest.  I felt dizzy and queasy and completely horrible.  I decided to go back to urgent care.  I had a sneaking suspicion my blood pressure was high.  I'm not sure why I thought that, it had never been high before.  Let me tell you, I was spot on.  My blood pressure was through the roof, so were my blood sugars! My blood pressure today was 178/99!  HOLY CRAP!  It's usually  120 something over 70 something!  My fasting blood sugar was 192!  It's usually 99!  That stupid steroid injection messed me up!  They told me they felt pretty confident that it was due to the injection, but after a week or two I should go to my regular doc to have my blood pressure checked. I was also told that the dizzy and queasy feeling was likely from stopping that medication for my breakthrough pain.  Apparently it has some hideous side effects. 

 I'm not allowed to work out for a few days.  I was instructed to relax for the rest of the day and just stay on the couch.  Um, yeah, I have a 2 year old!  I tried my best.  My son had a concert tonight so as we were getting ready, my daughter had a MAJOR poopsplosion.  I'm talking major.  So I had to give her a bath.  Then I had to get my son dressed up, to which my daughter decided that SHE needed to dress up too.  After the running around for about 20 minutes, my arms got all red and hot again.  I guess they were not joking about taking it easy for a few days.  It's been hours since I got the kids ready and my arms are still burning hot.

After this ordeal, I have decided that I will not try any new medications for my face pain.  I'll get the nerve blocks every few months but then I'll just suffer in (mostly) silence.  I can't go through with stuff like this.  I can't believe all this stems from a stupid antibiotic! I hate taking medication. 

 I have to go to the store tomorrow so I may just try out the blood pressure thing to see if it's gotten any better.  I'm seriously scared!  I keep wondering what is happening in my body when I run?!  Which brings me to another decision.  I am going to lighten up on the speed I've been trying to maintain.  What is the point?  I'm going to be running for the rest of my life so what is the hurry?  I might as well train a little more in my comfort zone so I can cross the finish line without dropping dead.  The first time I went through the couch to 5k program, my running segments were 3.5.  Yup, 3.5 was my running pace!  It was crazy hard for me!  I mean HARD!  I have to feel blessed with the fact that I no longer perceive 3.5 to be difficult!  I'm going to try a week with my running segments at 4.5.  It's not fast, but it's not turtle pace either!  If I still feel like I'm being challenged but not killing myself, then I'll set that as my pace.  If it is too easy then I'll bump it up a few notches.  I have a feeling 4.5 will be a good pace for me.  

Well, I'm off to dose up on some more benedryl.  I really hope my arms feel better soon.  I just want to get back to the gym and into my routine!   Have a wonderful night and thanks for reading! -Monica

What a great day!

I am SO very happy to report that I have not gotten any ear pain today!  I think the injection worked!  I keep getting this little twinge like it wants to start hurting but then it backs off.  I am SO ELATED!  I have pretty much had pain in my ear every single day since the middle of December!  The electric jabs in my face have really backed off too!  I still get really mild ones but they are not overly painful.  They feel more like a buzzing fuzzy sort of feeling.  They are not comfortable, but they are not agony anymore so I'll take it!  I don't think I could ever convey how RELIEVED I am!

I got my workout in this morning.  It was only upper body. It doesn't really take me very long.  Today I had the pleasure of sharing my workout with a friend!  It made the workout fly by!  It's so fun having a friend to work out with!  The only draw back?  I kept losing my count! HA!  I'm thinking I may need to increase my weights - I don't feel sore at all today.  As a matter of fact, I don't feel like I worked out at all!  I was sweaty and all, but not like I am after a run!  Tomorrow is a run day and I promised myself I wouldn't wimp out.  I'm afraid.  I'm very afraid. :-P  I think the BEST part of working out at my gym is the free hydrobed massage I can get every single day!  HEAVEN!  It's funny, but the ten minutes that I get a massage is the ONLY ten minutes in an entire day that I actually get to be alone in a room!  It's sad, but very true!  I can't even pee in peace - I usually have someone in the bathroom talking to me.

Since my workout seemed to be on the lighter side today, I decided to walk to my son's school to pick him up.  He was not impressed.  He felt that a half mile walk after school when he was "starving" was not his idea of a good time!  How could I resist though?  The weather was AMAZING!  It was low to mid 50's but the sun was shining and it felt so very awesome!  At least I got that mile in - half mile to and then half mile from.  I ended up having to carry my daughter piggy back for a good portion of the return trip.  My son had the audacity to ask if I could carry him too!  AAKK!  I sure hope he was kidding, but I don't think he was!  Then we got home and played outside for a few hours!  It was great!  I am really looking forward to summer vacation!  (don't remind me that I said this once August comes and I am BEGGING for school to start again! HA)

With the beautiful weather, I made it a point to wash the kids' comforters and blankets - then I hung them out to dry!  They smell so fresh!  Maybe I'll switch the game around and instead of the kids sneaking into MY bed at night, I'll sneak into one of theirs!  The only issue I have with hanging laundry out to dry is my dog.  She is a complete turd.  If I want to hang clothes, I have to be certain she is in the house.  That stink butt dog once tore four towels and two sheets just because she thought it would be fun to yank them off the clothes line.  How can you really stay mad at a face like this though?  I mean, seriously?

I ate really well today.... until dinner time.  I didn't go over (I don't think) but I kind of kept taking little "tastes" of the rice pilaf I was making.  I think it would probably be a good idea to not make that very often.  I seem to have a self control issue when it comes to that dish!  It would seem the problem is universal in my house.  My husband and both kids also ate a lot of it.  As one of my friends might say "it's amazeballs!"  I had plenty of points left over for dinner but since I kind of lost track of how much rice I actually ate, I'm going to just pretend I used all those points up.  I very well may have done just that!  I really don't think I went over - especially when you factor in all my activity points as well as my weekly points.  Ok, so I definitely did not eat 50 points worth of rice.  PHEW I feel better now!

Tomorrow I start a new medication, it's supposed to knock out the break through pain I'm still having after the nerve blocks.  I am really so impressed with the nerve blocks.  If this medication works as expected and I have an entire day with zero pain?  WOW I can't even fathom that!  It's a very exciting prospect!  It's been so many years!

I know it's only 9 pm but I am SO exhausted.  It has been a full and beautiful day!  I think it's supposed to rain again tomorrow (figures) so I am super glad I lived today to it's fullest!

Thank you for reading and have a WONDERFUL night!

Pushing myself!

Today was insane!  I knew it would be, but still!  It started out as usual, dropping my son off, hitting the gym.   Add to the usual schedule an appointment with the pain specialist as well as a dental appointment!
       I started Week 2 day 1 of the couch to 5k program.  DAMN was it hard!  I had to REALLY push myself.  I noticed that I would start talking myself out of running but then I decided to start talking myself INTO it.  I got some funny looks.  I know I was saying it loud enough that the people on either side of me probably heard.  I would say things like "come on girl, you've got this!" and "pick it up baby, you're almost there". HAHAHA  You know darned well those people must have thought I was insane!  I hate that I did this, but I will admit it to all of you.  I cheated on my run.  I was supposed to do a 5 minute warm up and then run for 1.5 minutes and walk for 2 - until I reached 20 minutes.  (I go for 25 since I don't count the warm up).  For two of the running segments I only ran for 1 minute.  *hangs her head in shame  It was SO HARD!  I just couldn't get my legs to go another step!  They were burning and screaming at me and my heart was pounding.  Once I started talking myself up though, I powered through it!  I'm hoping 5.0 on the treadmill doesn't prove to be too much.  I really want it!  Tomorrow is an upper body workout - but then Wednesday is another run.  I am DETERMINED to finish it!
     After the gym I had to race across town to get to my pain doctor.  He gave me an injection in my face.  OH  MY   GOD.  Words can not describe the torture!  The sucky thing is, it can take up to 48 hours before it starts giving me relief from my nerve pain.  I'm still in my usual pain, but now I have pain in my face from the injection.  Apparently, they have to go through a few different muscles with the needle so my muscles in my face are all angry with me. This is very similar to what I had - only my injection was closer to my ear and they used ultrasound to guide the needle.  This video is not for the faint of heart!

 On top of the injections in my face, I spent an hour at the dentist getting my xrays and having my teeth cleaned.  My face is very irate with me!  Cross your fingers that I feel better tomorrow!  I am happy to report that my teeth are in excellent shape and I don't have any cavities!  It's also good to have that knowledge since my trigeminal neuralgia causes my teeth to hurt.  It is a relief to know it really is from the nerve disorder and not an actual dental problem!

I never did get a chance to go to weight watchers for my weigh in, I'll go tomorrow morning.  I have to be careful - we are very low on gas and payday isn't until the end of the week.  I have to be certain to go to the gym 3 more times before February is over or else I won't get my reimbursement from Pete's job!

I know I promised a 20 by 39 list - I am only up to 11 right now.  I'll list what I have so far.  Maybe some of you have some suggestions!!

1. Weigh 40 lbs less!

2. Wear a size 18!

3.  Run a 5k!

4.  Run a 12 minute mile!

5.  Not feel exhausted by the end of the day!

6.  Finish the couch to 5k program!

7.  lower my blood pressure.

8. reduce my risk of diabetes

9.lower my resting heart rate

10. get rid of knee pain!

11. have only one chin!

Well, my little monkeys are in need of pajamas and brushed teeth!  Thank you for reading!  Have a WONDERFUL night! -Monica

Beautiful Saturday!

Today was absolutely beautiful!  The sun was shining and it was about 55 degrees!  Pete took my son to a basketball game so my daughter and I spent the day together.  I completely overslept and missed the daycare at the gym.  I'm not going to beat myself up over it though, I obviously needed the rest.  We went on a nice long walk - I'd say around 3 - 4 miles.  It was PERFECT!  My daughter had her baby with her again and once again I got funny looks.  It's funny, when I bought the doll I was so very excited about it because it looked so much like her when she was a baby.  I never thought this could pose a problem!  One guy actually said today that the doll looks like it could be my daughter's sister! HA!

I took it pretty easy again.  I figure Monday will be a good day to get back on track after my wicked pain attack.  Of course, yesterday my freaking monster of a dog (she is absolutely huge) barreled into me and nailed me in the knee cap.  I have no idea what part of her body was so hard that it hurt like that, but I now have a big lump and a bruise there.  It is really tender.  I figure one more day of resting won't hurt that either.  I'm not worried.  I got SO much more exercise in this one week than I have in the last six months!  I actually find myself looking forward to my weigh in day on Monday!

Monday is going to be pretty insane actually.  I have the usual drop off of my son to school, then the race to the gym.  I'll have to hurry up at the gym because I have to race across town to the pain doctor to get another injection in my face.  Then I go home and rest for a bit - if the injection hurts anything like the last one I'm going to need to put my feet up for a while.  Then I have to get my son after school and then go to a dentist appointment at 4.  EEK!  I am thinking ahead though!  I am going to have all of my meals for Monday already cooked and packaged up, ready to go!  That way I won't have an excuse to eat like crap!

You know, I thought it was silly of me to keep that journal like I do - you know, what my plan for the next day with all the meals scheduled in advance.  Well, let me tell you what!  I didn't do it on Friday and I screwed up like nobody's business!  I won't do THAT again!  I didn't even MEAN to not do it, I was so tired I just fell asleep before I could write in my journal!  I even fell asleep with it in my lap!  That is why I am going to do tomorrow's plan as soon as I finish here!  I'm feeling so pretty excited about this journey!  I can't wait to get back to where I was before surgery!  I think I'm going to make a list of goals.  Last time I did 36 by 36.  Well, this year is the big 39 - EEK!  I don't think I have time enough to finish 39 goals by my birthday so maybe I'll cut the number in half - well, mostly anyway, since 39 is not an even number. :-D   Let's make it 20 by 39!  I'm going to think on that, I am pretty sure I can get those written down and entered on a page on this blog by tomorrow night!  I know I still have to post some before pictures.  I have to admit.  I'm pretty intimidated by that.  It hurts me to the core that I am not where I was after all that hard work two years ago!  I'm sure I'll get them on here, I DID take them, I just need to lose a bit more weight before I feel ok with putting them on here!  I need some distance from this version of me!

Well, my little ankle biters are still awake and it's past their bed time!  It's time for me to sign off!  Have a wonderful night!  Thank you so much for reading! -Monica

Day of rest and dirty looks!

I took a day of rest today.  It wasn't scheduled, but my pain level is still not where I can easily handle it.  I should be ready to go tomorrow!  I have an appointment on Monday to block the nerve that is making my ear freak out.  Oddly enough - today my left ear started freaking out.  That has not happened in a very long time.  I suppose I'll have to report that to the doctor.  That scares me.  I hope I don't end up needing an injection on both sides.  I'll look like a walking marshmallow head!  Well, that, and it hurts to get an injection in your face. :-P

I had a quiet day at home with my little girl.  We didn't do much - we just snuggled a lot.  I think she is starting to come down with a cold, so I just let her watch movies today.  She is VERY partial to Minnie Mouse!   When hubby got home we all went to my son's school for "family night".  I'm not really big on these.  Personally, I'd rather spend family night at home with my family.  We usually have "family time" every Friday at our house.  That involves a movie, some popcorn, and the air mattress in the living room.  It's SO much fun!  After we finished the school's family night (it was actually pretty neat, there were a lot of stations and each had a science concept that you could explore through play), we went home and had our traditional family time.  We watched "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2"  I actually liked it MUCH more than the first one.  I didn't really like the first one actually!  My son went nuts over this - he LOVED it!  My daughter conked out in the first five minutes.

Oh, just something funny I thought you might get a laugh out of.  My daughter has this doll.  It is really cute - but it TOTALLY  looks like a real baby.  It's even the size of a newborn.  A few weeks ago it was unseasonably cold here - we even had snow.  Well, we had all run to the store and of course my daughter brought baby along.  She fell asleep in the cart so I had to put baby in the car.  Once I got both kids buckled, I put the cart in the corral but I had baby in my arms.  You know that mommy stance you never even give a second thought to?  I was holding baby like that - on my hip.  Well, baby is wearing short sleeves and bare feet with no hat.  This woman started YELLING at me.  I mean YELLING that I need to cover that child up and what was I thinking, treating an infant that way!  I was so stunned!  I held the doll up by one leg and said "IT"S A DOLL, LADY!!!!!".  She turned bright red and hopped into her car!  No wonder my daughter loves this doll - it really looks like a baby!  The whole reason I brought it up was because at the school's family night I ended up carrying baby and I was holding her with her face mashed into the coats I was also carrying. (I seem to be the designated carry all person).  People kept giving me double takes and it took me a while to figure out it was because of baby!

It was a pretty chill sort of day but I think I really needed it.  I'm going to do my run tomorrow.  I'm still not 100% but with trigeminal neuralgia, you rarely get better than 80% so I'll take it!

Thanks for reading!  Have a wonderful night!! -Monica

It's been a rough day.

My pain level has been through the ROOF.  I went to the pain specialist today.  He gave me a nerve block injection in my face.  HOLY CRAP did that hurt.  You can still see the injection site hours later!

See that red dot in my cheek?  Yup, that is where they stuck the needle.  Right below my eye.  Talk about a total freak out.  Anyway - he basically injected lidocane (not sure how you spell it) into my face and then the entire right side of my face from my temple to my chin went completely numb.  It was freaky.  The numbness eventually wore off but now my cheek hurts where they injected me.  I have problems with pain in my face as well as a very painful stabbing feeling in my ear.  This injection would not help the ear pain, I would have to get a deeper injection that needs to be guided with ultrasound.  They are talking about a few weeks before I can do that one.  For some reason the pain in my ear and my teeth kind of skyrocketed.  I thought I was going to die.  Of course my hubby is out for the evening and I have to take care of my two little ones.  Even as I type this I am in agony.  It is that bad.  Tomorrow I have a run and I'm not sure how I'm going to pull it off.  I did manage to get my workout in today.  Thankfully the pain didn't start until after that.  Please cross your fingers that I miraculously wake up pain free.  

I did eat a few things I wasn't supposed to eat, but points wise I'm still completely fine.  I still have like 40 weekly points left and I have not even touched my exercise points.  I'm not too worried.  I've noticed that high pain days tend to equal crappy eating days.  Oh and this morning I made some turkey bacon to go in my egg sandwich and after a few bites I realized that the turkey bacon had turned.  UCK.  I had a stomach ache for most of the day after that!

All in all it's been a freaking AWFUL pain day.  AWFUL.    I'm going to call it a night here but I am NOT giving in.  This stupid disorder is NOT going to win.  I'm going to do that run tomorrow even if it kills me!  

Have a wonderful night!  Thanks for reading! -Monica

Lemon Jello.

That is what my body feels like.  A big heaping bowl of jiggly, wiggly, lemon jello.  WOW am I ever sore today!  My upper body is very sore from my workout yesterday and today's run took care of my legs!  It's so funny, I was dreading today's run SO MUCH.  I kept thinking about it last night and all this morning.  When I got to the gym I talked to the child care attendant longer than usual - because in the back of my head I was afraid of the run!  WHY?????  It was awesome!  It wasn't easy, but it was awesome!  I was worried my run was going to be horrible because my foot was acting funny.  As I was walking my daughter into the gym I got a sudden cramp in my left foot. OH MAN it was intense!  It still hurt when I started running but it eventually backed off.  It kind of hurts again right now so once I'm done blogging, I am going to soak it in epsom salt.

I had another good day of eating right!  I have a few points left and I plan on making some popcorn!  I may have to push my last eating time back to 9 pm.  8 pm is the kids' bedtime and the whole process takes a good hour!  We got this huge box of microwave popcorn from Costco - it was an amazing deal!  There are like 40 bags of popcorn for less than 10 bucks!  We have a family movie night every Friday.  We put out the air mattress, pop some popcorn, and watch a movie together.  Now we will be set on popcorn for a VERY long time!

I came across a dilemma this morning.  Breakfast.  I'm not completely sure I have it figured out but I'm on my way to an idea. Mornings are crazy here.  I tend to be a night owl so I have a hard time waking up as it is.  I have to get myself and the kids ready and out the door by 8.  My son likes to eat breakfast at school so he does that most mornings.  I have to try to start waking up earlier so I can have my breakfast before we leave for school.  I try to make my daughter some oatmeal or a waffle before we leave and then her sippy cup with milk.  She doesn't generally eat much breakfast so she is pretty easy to please.  The problem is me.  I have to eat balanced meals.  I HAVE to.  My sugar gets wonky and crashes if I don't.  That means a real breakfast.  Who has time for that?  The big dilemma that I had today was that I can not eat before I run. It makes me so sick.  It also messes with my sugar if I eat before a run.  I usually have errands to do after the gym so if I don't have breakfast with me then it's no breakfast and that is not good. I think what I am going to start doing on run days is bring a cup of greek yogurt with me and keep it in my son's old school lunch box. (it's not cool for him to use a Toy Story lunch box you know - so I inherited it!)  I just thought of this today so I'm going to be ready for Friday's run!

Tomorrow is going to be a crazy day.  I'm going to try to plan for it but I'm hoping I can still stay on track.  Breakfast and dinner are not going to be a problem but I may have to plan to have lunch on the go.  Here is the craziness: Drop my son off at school then get to the gym and do my lower body weight training and some cross on a stationary bike.  Then I have to go to a new doctor (cross your fingers, I'm trying a pain management doctor to see if I can get better control of my Trigeminal Neuralgia!).  Then I have to grab my husband at work and go to my son's school for a teacher conference.  Then hubby has to race home to meet his brother so they can go to a game and I'll have to start dinner.  PHEW I'm tired just typing it!  Tomorrow is going to be insane.

I keep a notebook that has my beginning stats - maybe when I lose some significant weight I'll share the stats with you. :-P  I also have my running plan in there as well as my weight training plan.  Every night I sit down and plan out the meals I'm going to have the next day.  I've noticed that having something already planned REALLY helps me stay on track.  I think I'm going to have to go and start planning tomorrow.  I feel like I'm in need of an early bedtime!

Thanks for reading!  Have a WONDERFUL night! -Monica

Toeing the Start Line!

I'm back!  I decided to change the name of my blog because, frankly, Fat Girl Finding Fit just seemed so self degrading.  Every time I logged in I reminded myself of where I've been instead of focusing on where I am going!  I think the new blog has a much more aptly named title!

If you were not a reader of the old blog, I'll tell you a little about myself!  My name is Monica, I am closer to 40 than I'd like to think about. :-)  I have two wonderful kids - both under the age of 7.  I am currently a stay at home Mom, once my youngest starts school then I will go back to work. I have a very wonderful and supportive husband named Pete.  I suffer from a nerve pain disorder called Trigeminal Neuralgia.  While I do have some pretty bad days, I generally don't let it stop me from doing the things I love.  I might complain about it a lot, and for that I'm sorry.  Sometimes it is the only way I can get through the day.  I am very overweight.  Two years ago I was even more so.  I had lost 50 lbs and gained a love for running!  I did lots of races, mostly 5k but I did do 2 10k's.  I LOVED it!  Then I had to have surgery.  I gained back 30 lbs - BOO.  This brings me to right now.

I am basically starting back at the beginning.  It's been a very rough year for me, health wise.  I had to stop running in the fall due to a major prolapse of my uterus.  It was horrible!  I had surgery to repair the prolapse.  Let's just say I had a COMPLETE overhaul.  The recovery was very difficult and long.  I had to have a hysterectomy as well as a pelvic floor organ lift and a bladder sling was installed.  If it sounds awful, you should have felt it.  YUCK!  I'm VERY glad it's behind me!  I got the go ahead from my doctor to start running again in January, so I did.  Then I ended up with plantar fasciitis and achilles tendonitis.  Good Lord.  It felt like my body was against fitness!  I am happy to report that I NOW have orthotics that my podiatrist made for me and all is well with my feet again!  We ALSO found out that my husband's work will reimburse us for a gym membership as long as we go to the gym 12 times in a month.  EASY PEASY!  We found a really AMAZING gym down the road from us.  I am in LOVE with it!

 Yesterday was my first day back on track and I'm proud to say that I have stuck firmly to my plan!  I tend to do great during the day and then screw up in the evening.  I didn't do that yesterday!  I made a rule that I can not eat anything after 8 pm.  I think that should put a kibosh on the slacking off at night!  Here is what I am doing.  Dietary-wise I am following weight watchers.  I've had great success with it in the past so it makes sense for me to take back up with it again!  Fitness wise I am following the couch to 5k program that I did two years ago.  I hate that I have lost all my running ability but the AWESOME thing is that I have not lost my desire to get out there and run!  I think that should help me get my legs back!  I am also doing some basic weight training.  Here is what my week looks like :

Monday: couch to 5k
Tuesday: upper body weight training
Wednesday: couch to 5k
Thursday: lower body weight training and some cross training on the stationary bike.
Friday: couch to 5k
Saturday: upper body weight training
Sunday: rest day

For now, I am going to do most of my running on the treadmill - just until I can get a feel for the speed I want to run.  I am starting out with the running segments at 5.0 and the walking at 2.0 - all on zero incline.  I know this is not the same as running outdoors but I want to ease into this so I don't get an injury and have to start over AGAIN!!

My weight training are all done in 5 sets of 10.  Upper body consists of dumbbell bench press, dumbbell biceps curls, dumbbell shoulder press, lat pull downs, and triceps push downs.  Lower body consists of extensions, curls, and calf raises.  Once I get my muscles stronger I will add more weight training exercises.

I will be sure to get my husband to take a starting picture as well as measurements so you can all watch me shrink. :-P

This entry is getting insanely long!  I will call it a day right here and pick back up tomorrow!  I look forward to hearing from any followers I might gain!  Have a wonderful day!! -Monica